50 Years of Marriage

My parents will be married 50 years tomorrow. Their marriage is amazing and wonderful and inspiring. It makes me think about marriage and relationships and all of that. I've not managed to figure it out for myself, but I think one of the keys to their marriage is that they decided long ago, probably about 50 years ago, that they were in it together, for the long haul, no matter what. They decided that they were going on this journey together and they would make it work. They decided to be married and share a life together. Now, I know that sounds simple and obvious but really, once they decided to be together it was always a "given", sort of like breathing. Sure I can remember difficult moments. Sometimes I thought my dad was a little too hard on my mom. And I can remember my mom being worn out from her kids and her aging parents and the grandkids she helped raise. But that never made me think they loved each other less. Now when I spend time with them I see how they enjoy each other's company every day. My mom laughs at my dad's jokes as if she is on her first date with him.

I have been going through old photographs of my family and I feel pride, nostalgia and love for my parents and my siblings. I had and still have a joyful family. Sure, we're competitive and we don't share the same political or religious views but when we are all together in a room talking about camping and our disastrous dog, Pepsi, or the road trip to Florida - we're all laughing our heads off and remembering and enjoying one another. We all live in Minneapolis, I think 5 of us are in the same zip code. My brother John tried to move away once, but that didn't last long. Our proximity to my parents says a lot about what they did for us and for each other these 50 years.

Thank you Pat and John!

Church

It's a rift in the family sometimes. I grew up Catholic and some of my siblings still go to the church of my childhood. I go to church and sing in the choir of a church that is a better fit for me. Here are some things I love about my church.

1) Lots of people attend every Sunday - its always a full house
2) I am greeted every Sunday with a smiling someone saying hello
3) People laugh and applaud and sometimes cry during mass (yes - I said mass)
4) Everyone is included - no one has to skip communion because they are not Catholic
5) My feelings at the conclusion of the mass include: elation, belonging, happiness, responsibility, joy, peace, wonder . . .

Sometimes my parents join me at my church - but they still belong to their other church.
It's as if they feel guilty about being happy about going to a different church. Standard Catholic guilt I guess. Me, I just feel glad that I found SJA. And that it has let me blossom.

I wonder why people go to churches that are exclusive and depressing. That's not for me. Would Jesus be proud of our churches? Probably not. But He wouldn't point it out - that was never His style.